When someone loves you and purposely tries to hurt you, there is a core wound rising to the surface. It is difficult for you to reconcile love with attack. We ask you to stop trying to equate these two energies as if they could possibly co-exist in a harmonious blend.
Your core wound is the experience of attack where there was once love. Where there is love, there is no attack. Where there is attack, there is fear. And, fear is an energy that hides love. Love is a continuous energy that exists always and everywhere. Overlaying this energy can be many energies that do not resonate with love. When you experience these energies where once you experienced love, you conclude that love and its opposite are one in the same. The way out of this confusion is to separate these two energies so you can view them as different. If you continue to see them intertwined, you then surmise that to be loved also means you must accept attack. Once you accept attack as part of love, you are forced to come up with ways to manage the attack so you can keep the love.
Love is love. Attack is attack (sending negative energies with the intent to hurt). If someone you love expresses the energy of attack, they are consumed with fear. Their survival depends on managing that fear. And, that is why they attack whoever is the cause of that fear — according to their distorted perception of their internal wound.
Knowing it is fear and not attack, still does not address how to respond when love is the energy NOT being expressed. You’ve heard the phrase “love casts out fear,” which is true. But what if you are not the one afraid and it is the other in the relationship who is lashing out because of their fear? Your task in that moment is to love yourself first. Not because you are more deserving, but because you have the awareness that love is what you need. The one who is afraid, is afraid because they believe they have lost love. Therefore, they conclude that attack is what they need to manage the fear that is a result of that belief. So, they give attack because that is what they believe is all they can do in such a fearful state.
Loving yourself first turns your attention toward what you need most when attack (or fear) is directed toward you. Ask what you can do to nurture feelings of comfort, safety, and peace, and we will direct you. When you respond to attacking energies in this way, you refrain from nurturing your own attacking tendencies and judgments and reach for a way to sooth your hurting heart.
We are here to assist your efforts in restoring love as the predominate experience in your energy field. Ask for us to help the one who is attacking because of their fear, and step away. We will tend to everyone’s needs as much as we are allowed to be helpful. Once you have asked us to assist the other person, release any attachments to your involvement. And, concentrate solely on letting us assist you in restoring you back to health.
Do not try to convince yourself that attack is acceptable as a way to keep love. Attack is a sign that help is needed. Call for our help and then step away and let us give to you what you need.